Not so Perfect

The poem that bothered me the most so far that I have read is titled: The Clasp by Sharon Olds. When I first read this poem, the thought of a parent having a satisfaction while punishing their child, bothered me. These days you hear about parents abusing innocent children and even killing them. I’m not a parent but I could never imagine doing something like that to my child. Most abusiveness starts with the adult’s inner conflicts such as, stress, depression, and even situations where they are being abused themselves.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2012/sep/01/soaring-childcare-costs-work-nothing

The author explains "we had colds, / we had been in the apartment two weeks straight (Olds 1, 2)."  She had been home with a two children, one was four and the other one. The author could have been stressed out and tired of putting up with the children’s mood of being sick with a cold and her having to deal with it, while sick herself. Assuming she scolded them for horse playing or misbehaving she had it with them that she grabbed her oldest daughters hand in anger. She mentioned the oldest daughter "shoving him over on his face... (3, 4)." The mother than grabbed the daughter so hard by her wrist that the force she used while angry made her grasp her wrist even harder that she ended up enjoying the pain she gave her daughter." I even nearly / savored the stinging sensation of the squeezing, the / expression, into her, of my anger (7-9).)

http://mileskimoments.blogspot.com/2009/06/nursemaids-elbow-do-it-yourself-fix-it.html

Her daughter was so confused and in shock from the reaction her mother had done to her she had to look up to her to double check it was really her mother doing this to her. In the poem it says “she swung her head, as if checking / who this was (14-15)." For a little girl who is at an age where she can’t reason from right and wrong this action was a hard impact on her. Children think different about the world than adults. When adults think spanking or hurting their child in their own way, they may think that is the correct way to get their child to understand there wrong doing. A child doesn’t understand they are doing wrong they just learn that if they do that again the parent will hurt them and grow up fearing them.

http://grlonthemuv.blogspot.com/2010/08/why-worry.html

The mother reacted on her first instinct of anger. As a consequence, she hurt her daughter, but gave herself the satisfaction of taking control of the situation and gaining respect. The mother was dealing with her spouse and sickness and on top having to stay home with both children got the best of her.  At the end of the poem she did state “One of the/ two whom she most loved, the two / who loved her most (20-22).” The mother obviously loved her child and just wanted to discipline her and gain her respect.

Loving Betrayal

From all the poems i have read so far two have been very similar concepts. The first poem was "What I Want " by George Bilgere. The second Poem was "Hate Poem" by Julie Sheehan. To me these two poems seem to be about a lover from thew past. Someone who they loved so much yet that love might have turned into hate., or so they want to make it seem.

The first poem "What I Want", talks about how wakening up was "That to waken is to plunge through a trap door" he talkis about his ex as someone he hates and is glad she isnt part of his llife no more. In the poem " Hate Poem" she goes into detail of how much she hates him "I dissect you cell by cell, so that I might hate each one individually and at leisure." These two poems were written to I want to wake up in London on a spring morning and read in the paper that my ex- wife has received a lethal injection, courtesy of the state....but something went terribly wwrong and shes been left in vegetive state." than he follows a couple lines down and switches to how "wonderful to sit down with Maria at our favorite restaurant in Madrid." he constantly uses the negative events of his ex- wife with the positive events he remembers with multiple women. Throughout his poem he just uses the amusing hate theme and never reveals the reasons for their divorce, which leaves the reader wondering the many possibilities.




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In the second poem by Julie Sheehan, she keeps the negativity. Her statements of hate and to the extreme and very detail measure of hate is impressive. Makes you wonder what cause so much hate towards that person? The poet states "My pleasant "Good morning": hate...you know when im sleepy iI nuzzle my head under your arm? Hate? These lines to me made me think she is still in a relationship with this person and has to pretend to enjoy his company, yet she is screaming with hate.
She goes on with different hateful statements and once again i come to a puzzling staement towards the end of her poem. It says "my, hate which can never have enough of you" she seems to hate him yet at the end she cant seem to let go of him either and might even enjoy the hatred feelings towards him. It isnt revealed either on why the hate? what happen in the relationship? why is she still with him if she hates him?




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Ever After

The poem that I read and had me question and re- read several times was "Ever After" by Joyce Sutphen.

This poem has you question why did they get divorced? Whose fault was it for the relationship to end? How old were they when they got married? How old were they when they got divorced? How long did they date for before talking and thinking about marriage?

The narrator wonders what he thinks of her now that they are not in each other’s life. You assume she’s talking about someone who was part of her life and would like to know what he thinks of her now. The narrator uses the terms "ex" as the only thing that relates them now, they used to be one and used to be something but now are simply strangers that are not related but only have one thing in common two letters.

In the fifth paragraph she says the words they rarely used (husband and wife) seems odd to not be used if you’re married. Makes me wonder why didn’t they use those words? Did anyone not asked them of each other? When you go out somewhere where people don’t now you, you introduce yourself and the person you’re with and if you’re married well you say it’s your husband or wife. Maybe they had a weird relationship or kept a low profile of their relationship due to society? Family issues?

The sixth paragraph gave me the most curiosity of wanting to know what kind of relationship they had. It is mentioned that they "posed" (so young and helpless) as they cut a layered cake...Was their marriage obligated that she had to say they posed? Why would you say that scene in your life was a “pose”? 

When you get married it supposed to be a happy day that you never forget and don’t recall the memories as being fake or obligated. Maybe the narrator leaves out specific details to give the opportunity to use your imagination and let you make any conclusions of why things happen in her relationship with that person who used be someone in her life someone who met something to her and now wonders what has become of him and if he even thinks of her like she thinks of him.

The very last sentences of this poem seem to me that things happen that she kept just taking form him. She describes it as the layers of a wedding cake how first it’s sweet than it’s just a layer … and then becoming one thing once again.

From being two people that became one it ends with one’s self being one again and just left with the thought and memories of what it was and what they had when they were something.